6 Days Later

Today is where the bombardment of questions begin.

I felt good enough to head into classes today. I finally finished my anti-bis and I just found out I don't need to finish my painkiller medication, which bummed me out cause it gave me a killer buzz. I was not however looking forward to the barrage of questions from my classmates asking me if I'm alright or if I'm well since my face is deathly pale/green. There's a fine line between being concerned and being nosy, and MOST of these people were just plain nosy. As expected, I had to answer more than 8 times what surgery I went for and why. Even with a sarcastic tone in my voice saying that I had to sever my sympathy nerves cause I wanted to be a heartless bitch who didn't want to answer stupid questions anymore didn't stop them from wanting to know more about the surgery itself. Hell hath no fury as a mob of nosy people.

An interesting event that happened today that is worth noting was meeting J again. As the elevator doors opened, I looked out to see him standing there. Like a school boy with no where else to go except into my arms (I wish), he stood there with a grin on his face. Obviously the grin wasn't for me, it was for his girlfriend who was standing behind me. The whole bunch of Commies (short for Communication Students) from my class came out of the elevator and started chit chatting about some public apology letter from a fellow student to another. Whilst this was going on, I managed to steal a couple of glances at him. It was a hot day and he was sweating profusely. I wanted to rip off his shirt to reveal his cub-like body and *censored*.

Gathering up the courage to speak to him, I took a deep breath only to look at him for a mere couple of seconds. I could feel his gaze shift towards me and I looked away, exhaling. If there's an award for the biggest Jack Ass in the world, please nominate me. I should have just spoken to him! He probably thinks of me as a retard.

Although it's hard to believe for many, I am shy. PAINFULLY shy. Especially to the guys I really like and imagine going out on dates with. It's a disorder, just like how I don't look at people when I walk into a gay-infested area cause I feel like there are eyes on me and I suddenly am very aware of myself. I get nervous basically and very self-conscious.

I am still beating myself up over the fact that I walked away without even uttering a single word to him. Garr!

Music has charms to soothe a savage beast. Where the heck is my music now?