i just came back from having a drink with a friend, someone whom i considered after tonite to be my closest friend in msia. i thank u JW for giving me closure and giving me self esteem and waking me up from my nightmare. i realize now i have to be self sufficient and i have to love myself in order for me to start loving other people and having them reciprocate that love i've been searching for. in order to do that i have to gain self confidence and i assure my readers here that i will gain it and achieve it. this post is to remind me whenever i'm feeling down on myself that no one can ever hurt me the way i hurt myself and i will try never to let that happen again. i am able to survive without anyone, after all i'm still living aint it? so to start myself off i'm going to say sorry to myself. i have to apologise, and write it down so i can read it, to myself that i'm sorry for putting so much expectations, and i will never let anyone hurt me the way i let them and that i am not a fucking doormat.
i am not a fucking toy which anyone can take down and make me entertain them.
i'm tired of letting everyone step all over me. i am sick of letting people tell me what i should do and what i shouldnt. i am fucked off with people putting me down and saying i should lose weight. from now on i swear on my life i am going to do things for myself.
i will achieve my goal in time, i will be self sufficient.
THIS IS ME
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