Auto Mobility

A couple of months ago, I sold off my car because I didn't see a point in my family having 3 cars when petrol prices were increasing and my car was creating problems for me in terms of maintenance.

Today, I have a small pea-sized sense of regret because I've recently gotten a job that is quite far from my area. I have no means of travel; public transportation such as buses and trains are out of the question because there are no buses or trains around my area as well as where my office is located. So I have to rely on the notorious cabs in Malaysia.

My parents offered to get me a car, which I forcefully declined because honestly, I want to make it on my own. I know I'm not getting much but my 3 month plan is to move out of the house and rent my own place, and hopefully be able to survive within my earnings.

To be realistic and yet idealistic, I cannot rely on my parents forever. My fear of finances have already started to creep into my life and I rather not enhance it by taking a loan from my parents and pay them each month for next couple of years. If my parents are not around, I would not be able to get a loan from the bank in the first place so why should I take advantage of the situation now?

I'm filled with middle class guilt and I'm punishing myself through these means to be able to achieve what I can call my own in life. But somehow I feel like I'm going to give up and go back into my comfort zone of being taken care of by my parents.

Cabs take about 1/4 of my salary and it is unreliable, renting a car is too expensive, driving my parents car would take away my credibility at work, and I would have to get out at 4.30 in the morning to take public transportation.

I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't.

Gar...