Thursday, June 1, 2006

Stimulation of the Greater Mind

i had a really intense chat with a guy called Pang last nite, an editor of an online magazine and so cute, but what attracted me to him was the fact that he could carry on an intelligent conversation without seeming arrogant or come off as stuck up. we chatted into the wee hours of the morning and some of the subjects we both brought up were quite interesting and just struck a chord in me.

analyzing myself, i have a good life. i was blessed with the ability to communicate and voice out my opinions and have social skills. i pretty much had a platinum plated spoon stuck in my mouth ever since i was young. to grow up the way i am now, i think i did good. by the way this is not tooting my own horn, i'm just evaluating my life.

i shouldnt ask for more, i have wonderful friends, a great family (they could be better and stop pestering me to turn straight) and wonderful yet tragic experiences which taught me to be the person i am now. why should i ask for a relationship with someone i love when i love my friends and i know very well they love me too? why should i ask to spend my life with someone when i know that it's going to end disastrously and i could just spend my remaining time with friends and family?

i ask all these questions and yet sitting here right now and typing furiously, i know i want a relationship, i know i want to be loved not only by my friends but with someone i can share my deepest and darkest part of me with, someone who i can rely on to hold me tight when i'm feeling down or scared, someone to kiss me goodnight.

No comments: