right after i submitted my last entry, i got a call from an anonymous person asking me for phone sex. when i asked him who gave him my number he wouldnt tell me and kept on moaning and making sex noises.
what has the world come to now when gay men get numbers from their friends and start masturbating to anonymous caller's voices. this ultimately pisses me off, knowing that someone out there is giving out my number to people that s/he (most likely a HE) knows to make prank calls and stuff. do people really get off by listening to someone talk?
on a lighter note, i think i'm starting to develop feelings for another person. it's so fast i know but it just...feels right to be with him. unfortunately he doesnt know and i dont think i can ever talk to him about it. i cannot reveal who this person is because he is quite close to me and from time to time he reads my diary entries, which makes me even more frustrated because this is the only place i can be myself and say things that i cannot say to anyone else. i had a dream about him last night, lying on my bed with his back towards me and me kissing and sniffing the back of his neck. like every other human being, he has an unique scent...a scent which used to repulse me because of what we were together but now i am so attracted to that scent, i actually miss it.
seeing him makes me happy and yet sad. i wonder...is this what requited love feels like? or am i just feeling the "wanting what i cannot have"?
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