Little doll
Who carries the name of the most beautiful flower
Could you please bring me something from your parents' tower?
Of course dear Shadow
What is it you humbly ask to endow?
Walk back to your castle dear child
And make it your family's tomb
For all I really yearn
Lies within your mother's womb
I once heard of a man who will become like no other
Could you please bring me your still unborn brother?
The shadow bowed in gratitude, completing her task
Would you like anything in return, might I ask?
Please I hope you won't find me wrong
I would like to play, laugh and dance all night long
But no matter what I want
I would find a friend the most relevant
I’m sorry dear little flower
Friends I can not give
It is sadly beyond my power
Then I would like my brother back
For this deal of ours
Just turned awfully sour
What good are you, if you make me weep?
Please have my brother returned by the gates of my keep
Neither your brother I can give you
What you gave is given
I merely strive for a way to make it even
Seeing my offer is merely out of kindness
This child will never know the embrace of your fortress
Then I wish for a way to have you undone
Kind shadow
I want you mauled and buried
By the darkest and most blighted meadow
Fair enough little flower
Without feelings of either vain or rue
I will grant your one wish 'come true
Without honour
Without grace
You will travel to the darkest place
Untouched by the vilest of gloom
Your skin will always run paler than our brightest moon
Travel the road of which I pointed
And be forever gone
For sure one day
You will have me undone
Thank you kindly,
Shadow of whom I don't know
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
K.O. Ethan Wins.
When fighting with your partner/spouse, it's great to have in mind that there isn't a right or a wrong person. As long as both of the parties agree that they want to be with each other, nothing else really matters and small little arguments tend to vanish into thin air.
But when things get personal, it's harder to see why you're together with your partner. Everything gets blurred, the haziness sets in, you're lost and exasperation is your only best friend.
Tonight, a similar event occurred that had taken place in my relationship way back when and it was frustrating to see the same thing happen again. To tell this story, I have to start from the beginning, which took place at Red last night...
I had a presentation today with a couple of classmates, a critical approach/psychoanalysis of the movie Mildred Pierce which happens to be one of the best Film Noirs I have seen up to date. There were 4 of us, 3 questions to tackle and during the filming of the movie, 2 were absent, their names were Claudia and Aaron. Aaron Lee is a notorious slacker, who leaches off people's assignments and is a human parasite to those around him. At least I had Cheryl with me and she understood the pain and frustration of trying to organize a meeting between four of us.
So on the phone yesterday night (since I had all of their numbers, I had to phone them), I rang Cheryl and checked up on what she was doing, called Claudia and asked her what she was going to do and when Aaron picked up the phone, I explained to him what he should do. All of us were on track...or so it seems.
I skipped my Globalization lecture today so we could spend some time to work on Mildred Pierce only to have Claudia come an hour late and Aaron show up half an hour before our presentation started. Not only that, all of us were in awe that he spent the whole night doing nothing except print the synopsis of Mildred Pierce from Wikipedia (the most unreliable source in History). We were pissed, not only did he not show up for the screening, he practically did 5 minutes of work and called it a day.
So our presentation came, we helped him out and we all did a fairly excellent job. But Aaron on the other hand left the class and looked upset. I didn't like the way our group treated him and it was clear to me that he was desperately trying to reach out to someone during our talk. So when I left, I sent him a message saying not to feel upset over this and that we still did a great job. He replied me with an apologetic note.
I was having a stressful day. So time to relax, I had dinner with my significant other and we were having a good time until I started to tell him this story. Keep in mind that he was there when I was making the calls to the members of my group. That's when he interrupted me before I could finish my 3rd sentence and told me that I was wrong. I am the one to blame. Because it looks bad that all of us knew what we were doing and that he didn't. Also I should have taken the leadership role. My mates were also to blame as well for Aaron's downfall cause they didn't check up on his work.
I'm sorry, when did I turn into a babysitter? We allocated questions to each other and there wasn't even meant to be a leader but I made the initiative to call them up and check up on them. I made the effort to set up a meeting with all of us and is it MY FAULT that they're late and irresponsible? My role in life isn't similar in any way to Mildred Pierce.
This is where things got personal. He started to lecture me on how I should be during group work despite not even listening to me or even knowing how Aaron Lee works. He immediately sided the slacker instead of me. Fine. You just poked the bear. Hell shall rain upon thee who pokes the bear.
I gave him the silent treatment. He got pissed off that I wouldn't listen to him. Why the hell should I listen to someone who doesn't even bother to let me finish my story and jumps to conclusions?
He sent me home. I slammed his car door. I got really angry at him because he knows that I hate people who don't let me finish and lectures me in an accusing manner. I SMSed my friend T, to tell her that he won't be coming for her party this weekend. Unfortunately HE replied me and said if I didn't want him to go I should tell him directly and that he was being too ambitious by lecturing me (I'm still wondering what that meant). I found out that I had sent the message to the wrong person. One thing lead to another and it was left with me saying that until he learns how to listen to me before spilling his crap all over me, I don't want to hear his voice, speak to him, see him, etc.
And finally I got a message saying, "In other words, does that mean break up?"
Where the fuck did I mention break up? Someone please explain to me.
But when things get personal, it's harder to see why you're together with your partner. Everything gets blurred, the haziness sets in, you're lost and exasperation is your only best friend.
Tonight, a similar event occurred that had taken place in my relationship way back when and it was frustrating to see the same thing happen again. To tell this story, I have to start from the beginning, which took place at Red last night...
I had a presentation today with a couple of classmates, a critical approach/psychoanalysis of the movie Mildred Pierce which happens to be one of the best Film Noirs I have seen up to date. There were 4 of us, 3 questions to tackle and during the filming of the movie, 2 were absent, their names were Claudia and Aaron. Aaron Lee is a notorious slacker, who leaches off people's assignments and is a human parasite to those around him. At least I had Cheryl with me and she understood the pain and frustration of trying to organize a meeting between four of us.
So on the phone yesterday night (since I had all of their numbers, I had to phone them), I rang Cheryl and checked up on what she was doing, called Claudia and asked her what she was going to do and when Aaron picked up the phone, I explained to him what he should do. All of us were on track...or so it seems.
I skipped my Globalization lecture today so we could spend some time to work on Mildred Pierce only to have Claudia come an hour late and Aaron show up half an hour before our presentation started. Not only that, all of us were in awe that he spent the whole night doing nothing except print the synopsis of Mildred Pierce from Wikipedia (the most unreliable source in History). We were pissed, not only did he not show up for the screening, he practically did 5 minutes of work and called it a day.
So our presentation came, we helped him out and we all did a fairly excellent job. But Aaron on the other hand left the class and looked upset. I didn't like the way our group treated him and it was clear to me that he was desperately trying to reach out to someone during our talk. So when I left, I sent him a message saying not to feel upset over this and that we still did a great job. He replied me with an apologetic note.
I was having a stressful day. So time to relax, I had dinner with my significant other and we were having a good time until I started to tell him this story. Keep in mind that he was there when I was making the calls to the members of my group. That's when he interrupted me before I could finish my 3rd sentence and told me that I was wrong. I am the one to blame. Because it looks bad that all of us knew what we were doing and that he didn't. Also I should have taken the leadership role. My mates were also to blame as well for Aaron's downfall cause they didn't check up on his work.
I'm sorry, when did I turn into a babysitter? We allocated questions to each other and there wasn't even meant to be a leader but I made the initiative to call them up and check up on them. I made the effort to set up a meeting with all of us and is it MY FAULT that they're late and irresponsible? My role in life isn't similar in any way to Mildred Pierce.
This is where things got personal. He started to lecture me on how I should be during group work despite not even listening to me or even knowing how Aaron Lee works. He immediately sided the slacker instead of me. Fine. You just poked the bear. Hell shall rain upon thee who pokes the bear.
I gave him the silent treatment. He got pissed off that I wouldn't listen to him. Why the hell should I listen to someone who doesn't even bother to let me finish my story and jumps to conclusions?
He sent me home. I slammed his car door. I got really angry at him because he knows that I hate people who don't let me finish and lectures me in an accusing manner. I SMSed my friend T, to tell her that he won't be coming for her party this weekend. Unfortunately HE replied me and said if I didn't want him to go I should tell him directly and that he was being too ambitious by lecturing me (I'm still wondering what that meant). I found out that I had sent the message to the wrong person. One thing lead to another and it was left with me saying that until he learns how to listen to me before spilling his crap all over me, I don't want to hear his voice, speak to him, see him, etc.
And finally I got a message saying, "In other words, does that mean break up?"
Where the fuck did I mention break up? Someone please explain to me.
Night Of Horror
You know a night of wine and song has gone wrong when you're about to leave and some people starts to raise their voice and push each other.
This is what happened.
Standing there, frustrated about the fact that my boyfriend has the hots for another guy, I was talking to my friend about it when all of a sudden I turned around to see that my friends were pushing each other. I wouldn't exactly call them my friends, more like acquaintances that I got to know over the couple of weeks. It was mere seconds when Adrian handed me his glasses and threw his cigarettes on the ground and started shouting at John. There were about 10 of us there and 3 of them had rage in their eyes and started to shout at each other.
Trying to stop the fight with someone's glasses in my hand, I held a shouting Adrian back only to realize that it was David who got offended by John and he was trying desperately to land a punch on him. So a few of us held both of them back while the others told John to leave because he was being rude and obnoxious and there I was, feeling sorry for John because I know him and despite him being him, he had no one on his side. All of them were colleagues and John was basically the odd one out cause he didn't hang out with any of us.
So there we were, in front of a residential area and outside a pub called Red where there were 2 angry people screaming at one person and I couldn't do anything. When rage gets into a drunk's mind, all he could think about is how am I going to kick his ass. Straight men have egos and it seemed that David had a lot since he was the the only one raising his voice after the other two got settled. I didn't know what was going on, but I did manage to get something along the lines of not shaking each other's hand. Seriously, straight men. Drunk straight men. Drunk angry straight men. Why not just take your penises out and compare it and get it over with?
I had to leave. There was basically too much drama going on and I was pushed around by people who are trying to hit each other.
Why, oh why, do I always have to end up being the marionette?
This is what happened.
Standing there, frustrated about the fact that my boyfriend has the hots for another guy, I was talking to my friend about it when all of a sudden I turned around to see that my friends were pushing each other. I wouldn't exactly call them my friends, more like acquaintances that I got to know over the couple of weeks. It was mere seconds when Adrian handed me his glasses and threw his cigarettes on the ground and started shouting at John. There were about 10 of us there and 3 of them had rage in their eyes and started to shout at each other.
Trying to stop the fight with someone's glasses in my hand, I held a shouting Adrian back only to realize that it was David who got offended by John and he was trying desperately to land a punch on him. So a few of us held both of them back while the others told John to leave because he was being rude and obnoxious and there I was, feeling sorry for John because I know him and despite him being him, he had no one on his side. All of them were colleagues and John was basically the odd one out cause he didn't hang out with any of us.
So there we were, in front of a residential area and outside a pub called Red where there were 2 angry people screaming at one person and I couldn't do anything. When rage gets into a drunk's mind, all he could think about is how am I going to kick his ass. Straight men have egos and it seemed that David had a lot since he was the the only one raising his voice after the other two got settled. I didn't know what was going on, but I did manage to get something along the lines of not shaking each other's hand. Seriously, straight men. Drunk straight men. Drunk angry straight men. Why not just take your penises out and compare it and get it over with?
I had to leave. There was basically too much drama going on and I was pushed around by people who are trying to hit each other.
Why, oh why, do I always have to end up being the marionette?
Friday, August 10, 2007
Writin.g.
Yours is the voice
That keeps me awake
My head explodes
And my body aches
Experimental Writing is a tough and challenging subject which I chose to go through. Completely surrounded by fellow writers, I feel immensely intimidated that most of them are able to transcend from writing fiction into writing prose poems, non-literary satires, etc.
So here I am, this guy who apparently thinks he's able to write and is pretty much good at it and this whole notion of being good in writing shatters before him and he's having trouble coping with class. Not only that, he hasn't been able to grasp the formats and techniques 100% yet. Somehow or rather I hear my enemies and my nemesissies snickering from miles away. Don't get me wrong, the protagonist I'm speaking about is actually me.
To top it off, I have to go through an array of assessments to pass this subject and if one fails any of it, they have to fork out another subject's worth of fees to take it all over again.
The pressure is on and I'm feeling the sweat. Someone please hand me a towel, s'il vous plaît?
That keeps me awake
My head explodes
And my body aches
Experimental Writing is a tough and challenging subject which I chose to go through. Completely surrounded by fellow writers, I feel immensely intimidated that most of them are able to transcend from writing fiction into writing prose poems, non-literary satires, etc.
So here I am, this guy who apparently thinks he's able to write and is pretty much good at it and this whole notion of being good in writing shatters before him and he's having trouble coping with class. Not only that, he hasn't been able to grasp the formats and techniques 100% yet. Somehow or rather I hear my enemies and my nemesissies snickering from miles away. Don't get me wrong, the protagonist I'm speaking about is actually me.
To top it off, I have to go through an array of assessments to pass this subject and if one fails any of it, they have to fork out another subject's worth of fees to take it all over again.
The pressure is on and I'm feeling the sweat. Someone please hand me a towel, s'il vous plaît?
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