Shite

I'm so drunk right now.

And these are the words from a drunkard.

I just came back home fr0m a hectic yet pleasant night out with friends.

First I had to go to a friend's birthday thingy where I met my ex-lecturer and we had a good chat about everything. It was good to see him outside of his element.

Then I had to mosey on to the local watering hole; this friend's "farewell" thingy.

And I think I made some of my friends fall for me.

Shit.

Like I don't have enough drama in my life.

Kindred Connections

A friend and I were talking about random acts of kindness. She told me about a common friend who, at a night of A&W root beer, saw an old Indian woman lurched over herself by the road and asked her if she's alright. She had a bag next to her and told him that she was kicked out from her house in broken Malay. He was broke the whole week and had his last 5 dollars with him and without hesitation he took it out and gave it to her.

That got me thinking about the kindest thing I've done.

Back when I was working in 65, a local watering hole, I used to head to this dodgy park after work to meet up with friends or cruise around with my favourite songs watching cute guys stroll the area. I would also try to strike up conversations with them when times were right.

I remember a night when I was blasting my Canto pop CD and singing in my car whilst roaming around the park, I saw a guy who looked like he was lost. I went around him a couple of times to check him out and then I gathered up my courage and asked him if he was alright wandering the park so late at night. It was then he told he that he was from Singapore, was here in Kuala Lumpur for a holiday and that a friend dropped him off there and said he would be back in 2 hours to pick him up. He had no cash with him for some reason and knew no one in Malaysia except for his friend whom he had tried calling the past 4 hours only to get the voice message box.

Even despite his unlikely tale, I sensed despair and kindness in his tone of voice so I offered him a lift back to his hotel in KL. He said he stayed in Hotel Negara located somewhere near Petaling Street. I'm not really familiar with the streets of KL so I decided to just drive around until he recognizes his hotel. It also hit me that he was wandering there for 4 hours without food or water so I asked him whether he was thirsty and I popped into a nearby 7-11 to get him a large bottle of 100Plus and mineral water for him. He was very thankful and gulped down half the 1 litre of 100Plus and continued to tell me his tale of his friend. Apparently he came to KL for him and the dude was obviously not interested and dumped him in the most dodgy-est area known to gay men.

I finally found his hotel after half an hour of searching and I dropped him off. I insisted he take the liquids I bought for him but he thanked me so many times and refuse to take the bottle of unopened mineral water. It was late so I didn't want to argue, so I wrote my number on a piece of paper and handed it to him. I told him that if he needed help, he could always give me a ring. I knew at that moment when I handed him my number, I would never see this person ever again. And I was right.

Despite all of this, I am blessed that he didn't turn out to be a killer or some robber. I also felt good that I did an act of kindness and hoped for nothing in return...except for him to be kind to other people as well.

I do believe in the good in people. That is why I will do my best to help them.

And I hope that people would pay it forward.

G

I just came back from the hospital. My grandfather was admitted in yesterday because he was feverish and also complained of stomach pains. They are keeping him there because they suspect he was stricken by dengue.

Seeing him lay there with a plastic tube inserted into his arm, I couldn't help but feel a wave of sadness come over me. I bit my lower lip to fight back the tears. But my family doesn't seem to think it's a big thing. Maybe it's just me; seeing him weak and resting on the hospital bed hit me hard.

I know he will get well soon.

I love my grandpapa.

Closure

Wow! I'm drunk at the moment so I may not make any sense.

I went to Market Place tonight, hoping I would have fun and not worry about what's bothering me these past few weeks.

It was great! I drank, I had fun and I am drunk.

I realized that I'm still attractive to the same sex as I caught a lot of people eye-Raping me when I was sitting down drinking and dancing wildly on the dance floor. I still got it!

Anyway, I bumped into my ex whilst walking down to the dance floor and I must say, I didn't have any feelings what-so-ever. I must commend myself. I am finally over this person.

I saw him. I saw his boyfriend walking after him. And I realized...wow. I'm never going to be his carpet ever again. No longer will I walk after him like a dog. That torch has been passed on to another soul. May the God of Tolerance bless him.

I am finally free of any constraint that love has casted upon me.

I have my closure.

Freedom.

I am now free.

Ava Adore

I love Smashing Pumpkins.

Billy Corgan rocks.

My ultimate favourite song - Ava Adore.

Since I don't know how to put videos here, you can check out the music video by clicking here!

Sigh....

It's been a while since I've posted up anything, mostly because I'm been so frustrated with myself.

I applied for jobs overseas (S. Korea and Taiwan) teaching English cause I don't know what else I can do. Secondly because I don't foresee myself working in Malaysia at all - it's just not the place for me, no matter how much I love this place.

About a week ago, my resume got rejected from Berlitz Korea because I did not hold a Native English passport. Just because I hold a Malaysian passport, I was not even qualified to apply for a visa there.

Today, my resume got rejected from Berlitz Taiwan; also because I hold a Malaysian passport. Am I forever cursed to work here?

Malaysia will always be my home, don't get me wrong, but 'tis not the place for me to flourish.

And oh, I picked up smoking again...